Fiscally Chic

All the Feelings

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Baby Belly 2 CollageI’ve been feeling a bit emotional lately. Summer has ended and we’re down to the last few days (or weeks) as a family of three. I can’t believe we’re about to embark on a new adventure with two kids! I know we’re not the first parents to have a second baby, but I still wonder if we’re ready and if my heart is big enough to love two children. (Spoiler alert: you’re never 100% ready!)

And since we’re chatting, September seems to be a big a season of change for me. Even more so than New Year’s:

Beyond the life changes, I like to overanalyze things and occasionally bottle up my emotions (sure reminds me of the phrase “conceal, don’t feel” from Frozen). Add a few pregnancy hormones and a little bit of sleep deprivation and it sounds like a great combination, right? So I’ve decided to write things down and hopefully let some of my anxiety go. This post might be more for me than you, so feel free to move along.

When pregnant with Monica, I stressed out over minor things like choosing a diaper bag (we decided to use an old messenger bag) and co-sleeper (Monica slept in the bassinet of the pack and play in our room for the first 3 months, or so). This time around, things are a bit more complicated since we have another little person to take care of. Sure, I’ve waffled over the baby’s  and swaddle blankets, but that doesn’t usually keep me up at night. Here are a few things on my mind lately and how I’ve/we’ve addressed them:

  • Monica’s life is going to be rocked, so we want to have some special time with her before the baby comes.
    • The biggest thing we did was did was ride the train into the city for breakfast. Monica loves trains and this was probably the highlight of her month.
    • We’ve also been reading her I’m a Big Sister (I’m a Big Brother is also available) and Waiting for Baby.
    • More on C sections down below, but if I go all the way to my backup C section date, we plan on having one more special day as a family of three (cue the waterworks!).
  • At this point in my pregnancy, I feel a little guilty for not being able to play with her as much as I’d like because: a) I’m tired, b) it’s too darn hot outside, and/or c) I have limited range of motion these days.
    • Thank goodness for Dada’s who are willing to go to the park for the umpteenth time!
    • I also try to snuggle, read books, and do less intense (and indoors) activities with Monica.
  • I still need to work on Monica’s baby book! Darn you, Pinterest and Instagram, with your unrealistic standards of perfection!
  • Make sure Monica gets the individual attention she needs once the baby is here.
    • The book Siblings Without Rivalry has been really helpful. The best tip is to treat your children uniquely, not equally.
  • We need to get Monica’s new room ready. We don’t want Monica to feel “evicted” from her old room by the baby.
    • I wasn’t sure if there would be time to do this before the baby came, but Monica eagerly helped move her toys into her new room this past weekend. And my parents were a huge help! My mom helped sew new blackout curtains and my dad helped move the crib into her new room.
    • We still need to decorate and move more clothes into Monica’s new room. Maybe we’ll tackle that this weekend.
  • See also: Transitioning to a big bed.
    • Monica hasn’t tried to climb out of her crib yet, so we’re putting this on the back burner. Since the baby will sleep in our room for about 3 months, we have until January to really worry about the big bed.
    • When the time comes, we already have orange twin sheets ;)
  • I need my some “me time.”
  • We need some time together as a couple.
    • John’s parents babysat Monica while we went to a movie and then enjoyed drinks and dessert.
    • We also took a day off of work (and still dropped Monica off at daycare) to have a “day date.” I got my hair cut in the morning and then we got massages and went out to lunch together. It was so nice to order what we wanted and not have to worry about spilling drinks or food on the floor!
    • When my parents were in town this last weekend, they watched Monica while we went out to dinner for our anniversary.
  • Will I have a VBAC or C section? When will the baby come?
    • This one is high up there on the “let it go” list. The ultimate goal is to have a healthy baby and safe delivery.
    • I’m hoping for a VBAC, but also preparing for a C section. I have a back up C section scheduled after my due date juuust in case.
    • While we’re talking VBAC’s, I’m a little afraid of the unknown and pain. Monica gave me some pretty decent back labor last time. If Baby #2 is in the right position, it shouldn’t be as bad…right?
    • I’m also giving myself permission to get an epidural if things get too unbearable. No need to feel pressured into being a martyr.
  • Will I be able to breastfeed the baby? Monica nursed until she was almost 20 months old.
    • I’ll definitely be chatting with the lactation counselor at the hospital!
  • Weight gain…ugh. I’ve already gained more than the recommended 25 – 35 pounds and it’s a big scary number on the scale!
    • My doctor doesn’t seem to be overly concerned and my blood pressure looks good.
    • I think I weigh close to my ending weight when Monica was born; and I was able to lose a good chunk of the baby weight in the first few weeks thanks to nursing.
  • Is the baby a boy or girl?
    • We have access to boy and girl clothes, so this should be a non-issue. Let’s embrace the surprise!
  • The comparison trap and biases…ugh
  • Do we have what we need?
    • I’m pretty sure somebody will be running to the store for us in those first few days.
    • And let’s be honest, Amazon Prime (and Amazon Mom) is the greatest with 2 day delivery! Even with a natural delivery, I’ll be in the hospital for 2 days. That’s plenty of time to place an order and have it delivered by the time we return home. Three cheers for online shopping!

How did you manage last-minute new mommy anxieties? Especially when going from 1 to 2 kids??? If it includes kicking your feet up and enjoying a tub of ice cream that’s resting on your belly, we should hang out ;)