Back to Work

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The local schools are back in session, and I’m having my own back to school moment of sorts. My maternity leave is winding down, which means it’s back-to-work-time for me. To say I have mixed feelings is an understatement. While I’m excited for a little more adult interaction and to stretch my brain muscles, I’m not looking forward to sacrificing the snuggles with my little lady.

This is my first time going back to work, so I don’t know how it’ll go emotionally. Yes, I know I won’t stop thinking about her during the day and will count down the minutes until I can scoop her up and give her a big hug and kiss again. But how hard will these emotions hit? I felt a shift is priorities when we got engaged and then married, so I can only imagine the scope of my emotions now that I’m a MOM. Monica has rolled from her front to back and is currently working on kicking herself over from her back to front. Will I miss a milestone while she’s at daycare? Mommy guilt is a beast.

And then there’s the (hopefully not too much) stress of pumping at work. I’ve been nursing exclusively, with only a bottle on occasion, so I’m not sure how much she’ll be drinking during the day. And whether I’ll be able to pump enough for her. We have to provide daycare a can of formula just in case, but I’d really like to avoid that. Personal preference and no judgment on the mamas who need to supplement with formula or use formula exclusively. Every mama needs to do what’s best for themselves and their little one.

On a lighter note, I’m looking forward to wearing “real” clothes again! Though I might have to take an inventory of said “real” clothes before going back to work to be sure I have things to wear! Sure, I still occasionally wear maternity clothes, but I don’t want my coworkers to think I’m pregnant again. Perhaps a little “back to work” shopping is in order this weekend ;)



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